{"id":92,"date":"2014-08-28T18:45:27","date_gmt":"2014-08-28T22:45:27","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/weareogre.com\/main\/?p=92"},"modified":"2014-08-28T18:45:27","modified_gmt":"2014-08-28T22:45:27","slug":"you_might_be_a_triathlete_if","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/weareogre.com\/main\/2014\/08\/28\/you_might_be_a_triathlete_if\/","title":{"rendered":"You Might Be a Triathlete If"},"content":{"rendered":"<ul>\n<li>\n<p>You failed high school chemistry but you could teach a course on lactic acid<\/p>\n<\/li>\n<li>\n<p>While at the gym, you change clothes as fast as possible because it feels like a transition<\/p>\n<\/li>\n<li>You wear your heart rate monitor during sex.<\/li>\n<li>You bring bottled water to a party so that you\u2019re properly hydrated for the next morning\u2019s long run<\/li>\n<li>Everyone else at the party also brought their own bottled water because you don\u2019t have a social life outside of triathlon.<\/li>\n<li>Everyone showed up by 7pm and left by 10pm<\/li>\n<li>When you wear you\u0010\u0010\u0010\u0010r bathing suit under your work clothes to make a fast transition from work to swim on your lunch hour<\/li>\n<li>Your girlfriends are insanely jealous of your tan legs. Until they realize that the tan stops at your bike shorts.<\/li>\n<li>One of the criteria of a vacation is that the hotel has a spin bike, pool and there\u2019s running trails nearby<\/li>\n<li>Baggage for any out of town trip includes running gear and goggles<\/li>\n<li>90 degrees is too hot to mow the lawn but not to go on a century ride<\/li>\n<li>You consider Clif Bars one of the four food groups<\/li>\n<li>You wake up at 5 am but don\u2019t get to work until 9.<\/li>\n<li>You think there are only two seasons during the year, triathlon &amp; marathon.<\/li>\n<li>The inside of your car looks like a going out of business sale at Sports Authority.<\/li>\n<li>You consider work, recovery time between training sessions.<\/li>\n<li>You have a water bottle when you drive your car.<\/li>\n<li>You spend your 2 week annual vacation at a training camp.<\/li>\n<li>You know exactly how much protein each energy bar has.<\/li>\n<li>Your legs are smoother than your girlfriend\u2019s.<\/li>\n<li>You use race shirts to clean your bike.<\/li>\n<li>You know you\u2019re a triathlete when you take more showers at the gym than at home.<\/li>\n<li>6:30 am is sleeping in.<\/li>\n<li>You have everything needed in your car to swim, bike or run within 5 minutes notice.<\/li>\n<li>The one \u201csuit\u201d you own has Xterra written on the chest.<\/li>\n<li>You catch yourself about to blow a snot rocket while walking around the office.<\/li>\n<li>You know you\u2019re a triathlete when you take ice baths!<\/li>\n<li>You can plow through a whopping plate of pancakes and sausage and go back for seconds with a clear conscience.<\/li>\n<li>You don\u2019t mind your spinach in liquid form.<\/li>\n<li>Your cologne of choice is chlorine.<\/li>\n<li>You consider \u2018bonking\u2019 a bad thing.<\/li>\n<li>You know you\u2019re a triathlete when your house and office is littered with half full water bottles<\/li>\n<li>Your bike costs more than your car.<\/li>\n<li>You shout \u201con your left\u201d when passing people in the aisles at the grocery store.<\/li>\n<li>You use the words \u201conly\u201d and \u201c10k\u201d in the same sentence.<\/li>\n<li>IM no longer refers to \u2018instant message\u2019.<\/li>\n<li>You use the words \u201ceasy\u201d and \u201clong run\u201d in the same sentence.<\/li>\n<li>You not only eat gels, but you know the best flavors for every brand.<\/li>\n<li>Your bath towel is never dry.<\/li>\n<li>Your wife no longer thinks it\u2019s strange that you keep a heart rate monitor at your bedside.<\/li>\n<li>You take (at least) two showers a day.<\/li>\n<li>You think the ultimate form of wallpaper is all your racing bibs.<\/li>\n<li>You have a vanity license plate with the word \u201cKona\u201d in it.<\/li>\n<li>After you meet someone and they tell you they race, you go home and check online to see what age group they\u2019re in and what their times are.<\/li>\n<li>You plan vacations around where your next race will be.<\/li>\n<li>You feel like you took the day off because all you did was swim 3000 yards.<\/li>\n<li>You show up to work on Mondays with faded race numbers written all over your arms and legs.<\/li>\n<li>About half the shirts you own have at least a dozen logos on the back of them.<\/li>\n<li>There is a group of people in your life about whom you are more likely to know how fast they can swim 100 meters than their occupations.<\/li>\n<li>There\u2019s a separate load of laundry every week that is just your workout clothes.<\/li>\n<li>You don\u2019t giggle anymore when someone uses the word \u2018Fartlek\u2019.<\/li>\n<li>Your bike is in your living room (possibly mounted on your trainer).<\/li>\n<li>A car follows too closely behind you and you accuse them of drafting.<\/li>\n<li>Your friends cried during The Notebook; you cried during the television coverage of the Ironman World Championship.<\/li>\n<li>Your husband\/wife is looking forward to the day when you will slow down and just run marathons.<\/li>\n<li>You see no problem with talking about treatments for chafing or saddle rash at the dinner table.<\/li>\n<li>You know you\u2019re a triathlete when nobody believes you when you say \u201cI\u2019ll never do an Ironman\u201d.<\/li>\n<li>You have peed outdoors more times in the last year than you did in your first year of college.<\/li>\n<li>You call a 5 mile run an easy day.<\/li>\n<li>You shave way too many body parts.<\/li>\n<li>You spend more money on training clothes then work clothes.<\/li>\n<li>You clean your bike more often than your car.<\/li>\n<li>Your car smells like a locker room.<\/li>\n<li>You have far more pairs of shoes in your closet than your non-tri wife does in hers.<\/li>\n<li>You go for a 5K cooldown run after a 5K race just so that you can call it a training session.<\/li>\n<li>You have to explain to your co-workers what \u201csplits,\u201d \u201cbricks,\u201d and \u2018LSDs\u201d are.<\/li>\n<li>You know you\u2019re a triathlete when people see your \u2019140.6\u2032 sticker on your vehicle and ask what radio station that is.<\/li>\n<li>You\u2019ve forgotten how to drink out of cups.<\/li>\n<li>When asked how old you are you answer your age group (40-44).<\/li>\n<li>When people praise you for being able to run 15 miles you feel insulted.<\/li>\n<li>You purchase your new car to match the color of your bike.<\/li>\n<li>You know you\u2019re a triathlete when your car purchase depends on whether your bike will fit in the back.<\/li>\n<li>You consider sprint triathlons as group training sessions.<\/li>\n<li>You reach for a snack, and its a Clif Bar.<\/li>\n<li>You would rather surf race pictures than watch TV<\/li>\n<li><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>You failed high school chemistry but you could teach a course on lactic acid While at the gym, you change clothes as fast as possible because it feels like a transition You wear your heart rate monitor during sex. You bring bottled water to a party so that you\u2019re properly hydrated for the next morning\u2019s [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[21],"tags":[24,22,23],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/weareogre.com\/main\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/92"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/weareogre.com\/main\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/weareogre.com\/main\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/weareogre.com\/main\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/weareogre.com\/main\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=92"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"http:\/\/weareogre.com\/main\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/92\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":93,"href":"http:\/\/weareogre.com\/main\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/92\/revisions\/93"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/weareogre.com\/main\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=92"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/weareogre.com\/main\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=92"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/weareogre.com\/main\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=92"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}